Sex is one of the most natural, human instincts and has the potential to be a fantastically sensual, mind-blowing experience. However, like anything else, sex is not without its faults. Here are some common ways that sex can turn sour, and what to avoid doing:
Don’t take it so seriously
Always expect the unexpected when it comes to sex, as every person and their body is different, and being able to laugh and be kind in awkward situations will improve your confidence as a couple, enabling you to experiment and feel comfortable together no matter what happens.
You and your partner may sometimes make unusual noises during sex, someone might slip off in a daring position, maybe you broke a spring on the bed and you know your parent-in-laws are only downstairs; Whatever happens, laugh about it.
Don’t introduce shock experiments
Experimenting with new ideas, positions and fantasies is definitely a must, yet surprising your partner with a spank so hard it leaves a mark might cause issues.
Yes, you may want to recreate a sex position you read about and get your partner to do a headstand, or you might want to rub ice all over their body, but communication is key here.
Rather than go full steam ahead and whipping out the ice cubes one Wednesday night, firstly create that trust and bond where you can discuss what you want to do, and leave surprises out of the bedroom.
Don’t just take, take, take
It goes without saying to never do anything you aren’t comfortable with, yet if you simply find yourself being lazy and expecting to receive more than you give, your partner could quickly turn resentful.
If it’s that you cannot bring yourself to perform oral sex on your partner, all is not lost, and you can substitute this with many other forms of physical attention, yet you cannot then expect to demand oral sex from them.
Foreplay is about give and take, and an intimate sexual experience involves both parties giving pleasure to one another, wanting to learn how to please the other person in every way.
Don’t fake your big O
For the ladies – If you often find yourself faking your orgasm, think about why you feel the need to lie, and address the issue honestly. Is your partner rushing foreplay and becoming passive aggressive when they can’t make you orgasm in one minute?
Pressure is not sexy, yet you are not helping anyone by pretending. You may want to make him feel better, however he needs to know that a woman’s orgasm can take time, and you both need to talk about what turns you on.
Obviously, when we are about to have sex, we never really know how it’s going to pan out, especially with a new partner. Be honest, open, relaxed and share the good feelings, and hopefully at least one orgasm will come your way.